Choose Again

Giving and taking

2010-06-22T01:58:00.002-05:00

You believe in a world that takes, because you believe that you can get by taking.

In a world that takes our egos tell us we have to be careful to safeguard what we have otherwise we will "lose" it. In fact, it is only when we give that we receive. Giving and receiving are one and there is nothing to gain by "taking". In fact this is an ego debate because the truth is that we are love and that is all that is real. Love is abundant and to extend it is our birthright.

Trust

2010-06-20T02:09:00.000-05:00

Trusting your brother is essential to establishing and holding up your faith in your ability to transcend doubt and lack of sure conviction in yourself.

Whenever I judge my brother/sister instead of trust that they are exactly where they are supposed to be, I am of course judging myself (they are only reflections of me). So when I accept the truth I transcend my doubt about myself.

Innocence

2010-06-18T04:05:00.002-05:00

The guiltless do not doubt their own ability because they know their function will be filled completely in the perfect time and place.

When I recognize the truth about myself (my innocence) I have no concern about "getting it done" or getting it done on time. I rest in the knowing that it will happen without my needing to control.

Compassion

2010-06-17T05:05:00.000-05:00

As we learn to have compassion for ourselves, the circle of compassion for others - what and whom we can work with, and how - becomes wider.
Pema Chodrun

When we react lovingly and with more kindness to ourselves, we naturally extend this to others thereby teaching kindness through example.

Only love

2010-06-16T03:43:00.000-05:00

" You are only love, but when you deny this, you make what you are something you must learn to remember."

I am slowly learning to relinquish the the little self that I made up in order to remember the truth that I am only love. My ego wants me to maintain my separateness and my individuality but when I know I am love my little self disappears into the heart of God.

Message from Christie

2010-06-15T03:29:00.001-05:00

Dear All,

My daughter Kayla, recently returned from the centre in Costa Rica and I have found it to be such a delight to have someone in my house to process with I thought I would pass this pleasure on to all of you. No, this does not mean Kayla will be moving in with you! If you would like to have a processing partner or would be willing to help others process their upsets please send me your name and phone number. I will compile a list of people who are willing to be contacted and send it out one week from today ( Monday, June 21st). The more names the better!

See you on Wednesday.

Love Christie
604 720 7093
christie@choose-again.com

Circle time;
Wednesdays from 7pm - 9.30pm
4438 West 5th Ave
$20.00 per person

About grievances

2010-06-14T03:49:00.000-05:00

"Grievances darken your mind, and you look out on a darkened world. Forgiveness lifts the darkness, reassert your will, and lets you look upon a world of light."

When I hang onto a grudge about someone then I am making myself miserable. My ego says that my upset will make the other pay! Crazy ego. It simply makes me miserable.Forgiveness melts this upset and allows me to see myself and the other person in a completely different way.

Jerry Jampolsky interview with Diederik Wolsak

2010-06-13T03:15:00.003-05:00

Listen to Jerry Jampolsky's one hour interview with me on http://www.blogtalkradio.com/love-fear-and-attitude/2010/06/12/attitudinal-healing-centers-in-vancouver-bc-and-costa-rica

Forgiveness

2010-06-11T02:34:00.000-05:00

All aspects of the self that I made up can be relinquished through forgiveness. What will be left? Only love.

Don't misinterpret what compassion or patience really is.

2010-06-10T13:04:00.000-05:00

For example, trying to smooth everything out to avoid confrontation, not to rock the boat, is not what's meant by compassion or patience. It's what is meant by control. Sometimes we don't know what is going to help, but we need to speak and act with clarity and decisiveness. This comes with opening our heart and not running away. Pema Chodron

Workshop in Vancouver on April 24

2010-04-03T07:58:00.002-05:00

Diederik Wolsak, our Program director will lead the workshop. This month's topic will be forgiveness. Who do you find it difficult to forgive? What have you done that you may consider to be unforgivable? What does it mean to forgive? We will discuss these issues and more. You must confirm your space with payment prior to April 21.
The workshop will be held at 4438 West 5th Ave. Please make payment before April 21 to sign up. Space is limited.
Cost is $150.
For more information and to sign up:
Call Christie at 604-720-7093
Email us at csdakin@shaw.ca

The latest interview with Diederik

2010-03-25T12:54:00.004-05:00

An October 2009 interview with Italian Television at the International Transpersonal Psychology Conference in Milan, Italy. Our Program Director, Diederik Wolsak, addressed delegates and discussed the Choose Again approach to depression, anxiety and substance abuse issues.

Vancouver, Saturday, January 23, Choose Again Workshop

2010-01-15T10:09:00.001-06:00

Saturday January 23, 10am - 5pm in Vancouver, $150
Call Christie Dakin at 604 720 7093
See www.choose-again-vancouver.com for details

Diederik leads a workshop that is limited to 10 people as an introduction to the work that we do at the center. This time is totally interactive and personal. The purpose of the workshop is for each participant to learn to experience the peace of mind that comes from recognizing their intrinsic and unchangeable worth, and to then be able to make choices in their lives which lovingly reflect the person they truly are rather than the person they believed themselves to be.

Vancouver, Thursday, January 21st, Choose Again Open House

2010-01-07T17:36:00.003-06:00

If you or friends or family would like to know more about the retreat, please come to our Open House in Vancouver to learn more about the program. You can ask questions in a casual atmosphere. Diederik and the rest of the staff will be there to answer any questions. Please RSVP, we have limited seating.

See www.choose-again-vancouver.com for map and contact details.

Thanks!

Workshop in Vancouver on Nov 29

2009-11-06T20:24:00.003-06:00

Sunday, November 29th, 10am - 5pm in Vancouver.
Call Christie Dakin at 604 720 7093
See www.choose-again-vancouver.com for details

Diederik leads a workshop that is limited to 10 people as an introduction to the work that we do at the center. This time is totally interactive and personal. The purpose of the workshop is for each participant to learn to experience the peace of mind that comes from recognizing their intrinsic and unchangeable worth, and to then be able to make choices in their lives which lovingly reflect the person they truly are rather than the person they believed themselves to be.

Choose Again Society in Vancouver web site

2009-06-08T19:12:00.002-05:00

The new Choose Again Vancouver site is now fully operational! The webmaster is still looking for photos that would be suitable for the site. Please send to sabalitoweb@gmail.com. Thanks!

Oneness

2009-06-01T17:51:00.000-05:00

This morning I had a communication with a wonderful friend who recently helped her friend through the last stages of her life. She felt good about all the help she was able to offer her friend and her friend’s family and now, while mourning her loss, began to question what the real motivation behind the helping was. My response to her follows: Rest assured that all the good you ever did (and enjoyed doing) came from your true Self. The ego cannot stand that idea and will always come in with that nasty little voice (sort of sounds a little like my brother Dick Cheney ……..) and questions what your real motives are. You already know the response to that voice: " ...... awww, honey ..... ". Yes, your sadness is in part due to losing your friend and at a deeper level losing your friend is a symbol of the belief that you lost connection to the Truth. Your sadness is an indication of your longing to return to the Oneness and the mad belief that you could actually have lost the connection. In Truth, of course, that could never happen. Oneness cannot be divided by definition. That i (the small 'i') don't question that separation with a smile is an indication of the profound insanity of my ego. Wondrously, when I do lovingly question my ego it vanishes. Love to One and all, Diederik

Perception

2009-05-25T13:16:00.000-05:00

There is no sight, be it of dreams or from a truer Source, that is not but the shadow of the seen through inward vision. There perception starts, and there it ends. It has no source but this.

Our perception of what we see in the world comes from how we are seeing it. How we see it depends on how we see ourselves. Therefore, to change what we see, we have to first change how we see ourselves.

Private sessions with Diederik in Vancouver

2009-03-29T13:49:00.000-05:00

From April 1-12 Diederik is available in Vancouver for private
therapeutic sessions. Call 604-221-2292

Workshop April 11 in Vancouver

2009-03-29T13:45:00.001-05:00

On Forgiveness: What is forgiving, who am I forgiving, how can I forgive someone for being cruel or mean to me? From 10 AM to 5:30 PM at 4438 West 5th Avenue, Vancouver B.C.
Call Christie at 604-720-7093 or email at csdakin@shaw.ca.
Maximum 10 people. Cost $150.

Vancouver Photos

2009-03-29T13:30:00.003-05:00

We are working on the new website for Choose Again in Vancouver and we need photos of the activities such as the workshop. Also, shots of the Vancouver skyline or bay would be appreciated. The photos need to be without copyright, you own preferably. Send them to sabalitoweb@gmail.com. Thanks.

Blame and innocence

2009-03-03T20:30:00.000-06:00

The blameless cannot blame.Those who have accepted their innocence see nothing to forgive.

Seems a little circular, doesn’t it? This is how this might work for me: if I am innocent then everyone else must be innocent because we are One. That means that as long as I see anyone as guilty I still have forgiveness to do for myself. Projection is such an easy and appealing ego game. I am tired of playing. Love to One and all, Diederik

New photos in the slide show

2009-03-02T18:45:00.003-06:00

I just added a lot of new photos out of Fahreen's collection to the slide show. See the bottom of the right sidebar. If you want to get bigger size images click on the slide show.
Peace,
Guus

Any wish

2009-02-16T22:20:00.001-06:00

Any wish that stems from the ego is a wish for nothing,and to ask for it is not a request.It is merely a denial in the form of a request.

Any wish? Let me see how I can see this. If I ask for something, clearly that implies that I think I don’t have it. Now, if the Truth is Oneness, if the Truth is that ‘everything I see is the Self’ (Upanishad) than it is impossible for me not to have something. So when I ask for something I must first have denied the Truth of my Oneness. Having denied my True Identity, and substituted the shabby ego ‘personality’ I so deeply treasure, I now have to ask for literally everything or fight for it, or take it from someone else….. not so pretty now, is it? Meister Eckhart says so lovingly: “The prayer of the heart asks for nothing”. Love to One and all, Diederik

What is your intention?

2009-02-12T09:01:00.005-06:00

Even your greatest enemy has more points of harmony than of disharmony. And so, as you are wanting to interact with a being that you are not getting along with, with a being that rings your warning bells continually, if you will intend to see that which you approve of, if you intend to see that which you like, then you will literally begin to solicit from that being, those things.

Are you understanding that in every relationship you have -- whenever you are having unpleasant experiences, you are attracting the unpleasant experience because that is where you are giving your attention?

Abraham Hicks

I have been reading a book lately by Abraham Hicks that addresses the power of intention, and I've had a lot of fun playing with the ideas. Following one of the book's suggestions, I have been setting an intention for each hour of my day, and I've been enjoying the results very much.

When I set the intention to experience the love that I am in each moment, I find myself reacting to people and situations in a gentle, accepting way. I am freed to look at events from a more creative perspective, and many new ideas come into my mind. I enjoy the flow of every moment.

When my intention is to move forward from a state of love, I am automatically releasing myself from any belief I might have in the power of fear, depression, anger or sadness. I find that by setting my intention hourly, I can easily re-set my course if I have drifted off purpose.

Your friend with a big intention and a happy heart,

Love,

Dawn

Barriers to love

2009-02-02T15:24:00.002-06:00

You may believe that you judge your brothers by the messages they give you, but you have judged them by the message you give to them. Do not attribute your denial of joy to them, or you cannot see the spark in them that would bring joy to you. It is the denial of the spark that brings depression.

This is speaking about how we put up barriers to love. If I am angry with someone and send out an attack, I can't see or accept the possibility of a spark of love or understanding that may come from the other person. This spark of love could bring me joy but if I deny it then I will feel separate, alone and depressed. Forgiveness will help me see my way out of this situation. Love Christie

Finding Hope and Joy

2009-01-31T16:17:00.005-06:00

"Don't make the same mistake as all those people who give up trying to change because they feel stuck in their habits. If you truly want to, and are willing to work hard enough, you can overcome them."

Rebbe Nachman of Breslov

A friend handed me a book the other day with the above passage in it. It was a welcome note of encouragement, as I had been feeling discouraged, and questioning the direction I was moving in in my life. My ego was also busy replaying many past events, and colouring them with a sense of failure and regret. As I read the passage, part of me felt that I simply could not try any harder to make changes in my life. The other part of me was greatly relieved to be reminded that I do not need to believe or feed, stories of discouragement and failure that the ego is always standing ready to whisper in my ear. I can always choose to see things from a different perspective.

This quote also reminded me that it is not about trying harder, which in my world is a victim position, but rather about doing whatever is needed to bring myself back to a state of peace. Trying is a practice that keeps the clouds of depression in place. What gently and completely dissipates them is to take a clear look at what I am mistakenly believing about myself and my world, and correcting those beliefs so that I can once again experience the love that I am.

Your friend with a peaceful heart.

Love,

Dawn

Value

2009-01-30T09:24:00.000-06:00

All things you seek to make your value greater in your sight limit you further, hide your worth from you, and add another bar across the door that leads to true awareness of yourself.

My value is intrinsic, I must take it for granted,and spend my time sharing rather than trying to "improve".
Love, Elaine

Value and Worth

2009-01-29T14:58:00.002-06:00

You did not establish your value and it needs no defense. Nothing can attack it nor prevail over it. It does not vary. It merely is.

There are few lines I could read that would offer me greater peace ……. IF I allowed the Truth of what is contained in those few lines to be True for me. Now, that is where the trouble starts. My ego, that wonderful little 4 year old that runs around in my mind having tantrums and anxiety attacks, still insists that IT establishes my worth. I have listened to that 4 year old for 62 years now and I know it is lying, and still …… what if it isn’t? Can I really trust the Truth in me is Love and Oneness? Do I have a real choice? Love to One and all, Diederik

A testimonial from Fahreen - tears of depression to tears of joy

2009-01-21T15:36:00.005-06:00

Farheen thought she came to the Choose Again center in Costa Rica to help heal her niece. What she discovered was that only by healing her own mind could she truly be of help. And so the journey of looking into her painful past began. What she found was the source of her depression, deep grief, anxiety, blame and guilt resulted from her interpretations of life-altering events. Her sister’s death when Farheen was 13 years old was one such event. Farheen promised her sister that she would raise her niece as her own child and assumed this awesome responsibility in a spirit of ‘grief, sacrifice and guilt’. Her niece, now 16, started going ‘off the rails’. Drugs, missing school and authority battles ensued.When Farheen brought her niece to Choose Again the idea was to get her fixed. Here is Farheen’s report on her experience at the center:

Well this trip has come and gone. It was a fantastic experience, one that I will soon not forget. Although I feel some sadness I feel overwhelmed with love and joy and such gratitude I don't know what to say further. Everything certainly does happen for a reason this I'm sure. It makes me want to cry, the experience I've been blessed to have not only experienced but am experiencing and will continue to. I will definitely come back to this beautiful country to its beautiful people. A country where the landscape is so pristine and so untouched it takes me back a few thousand years to what it must have looked like. A beauty so immense that only God could have been the Creator; everything working in pure harmony. Everything is perfect, from the tall lush green windblown trees to the constant hum of insects, the wind that flows through the trees with such grace and power; the fresh pure air, and of course the mystique. The people; with their beautiful smiles, eyes that speak louder than their words ever could, their pure outpouring of love.

Its funny how life works, travelling to Costa Rica, finding myself. I dreamt this. I wanted this. I've always wanted to do something fulfilling that gave back in some sort of way. Look how it slapped me in the face. In order to know you are doing God's work I need to understand that I have to find in myself, what I want to give others. I got healed and have been given the opportunity to help heal others. I cry every time I think about it. But my God it is not tears of sadness, or regret or despair as it almost always has been, I'm crying because I am so happy. Who woulda thought?

I was hesitant, to say the least, at first but the longer and harder I listened I realized that what I was learning was not a religion, nor was it claimed to be, but the basic fundamentals of any peaceful religion. Does my religion not teach love, truth and peace? It’s the core. I've maintained and strengthened my stance on my religion immensely. I will continue to go to circles in Vancouver. It's so much more powerful verbalizing your triggers and beliefs and forgiving them than it is quietly doing them in your head. It is very powerful to be able to do them on your own, but you just need to mix it up a bit and when someone else tells you how it is, it's somehow stronger.

I feel so empowered, so invincible. I am the truth. And the truth is this: Everything about me is love, if I can fully love myself than love for other will come naturally. I am innocent, nothing that has ever happened, happened because of me. It happened yes, but it happened for my healing and my growth. I am not my story; I am the one writing it. Therefore, I will not be a victim for I have the power to place values upon such things, such circumstances, such situations. I am worth it, because my worth has been established by God. Not my mother, not my father, not my brother, not culture, not society, but God. And God Supersedes all else. If I can be at peace and harmony, and love, free of judgement at all times than I am with God, as close as I can be in this life.

I understand that this will not be easy, I will be tested and triggered to let my ego sneak its way through but I am trusting of my will power. I've the taste of true freedom and love and light and I will not let it diminish.

What I realized with Z is this; I spoiled the heck out of her. Not just that but we were actually feeding off of each other to validate our beliefs. What would happen is one of us would trigger the other without even realizing and then say "see I am guilty", or whatever you made up. I needed her to fail so that my beliefs of guilt, of being a terrible person, of not being good enough, of being a failure, of being guilty of being alive would come up. These were such familiar feelings I didn't know how to live without it, and the same with him. We tend to go through life and actively, without realizing, find relationships, situations and circumstances that will validate our negative beliefs about ourselves. Z and I now have a holy relationship; one that is a healing relationship and that is true love.

For me, one of the biggest learning was forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean one must condone another’s actions. It means to forgive yourself for letting yourself believe that anyone outside of you could ever hurt you, and that those negative beliefs are true. No one can hurt me; they only can if I choose to let them. Only after I've forgiven myself am I going to be able to see that the person who I perceived to have done some unjust to me had their own beliefs and is tied up in them and has acted in accordance to it. You just have to be willing to let your feelings go, all the false beliefs that you've held about yourself, the story you've created about yourself, none of it is true, you've made it all up. Have an open mind, dive in and take a look. It's an unbelievable feeling to be able to let everything go and know it all happened as it should have. It's all perfect.

Love,
Farheen

Let's make a deal

2009-01-21T13:51:00.010-06:00

You had decided that your brother is your enemy. Sometimes a friend, perhaps, provided that your separate interests made your friendship possible a little while. But not without a gap perceived between you and him, lest he turn again into an enemy. Let him come close to you, and you jumped back; as you approached did he instantly withdraw.

I was reading the above passage the other day, and I thought how sad and scary and difficult it is to live out the ego's idea of love, which is described pretty well above. The ego is always looking to get, and is constantly bargaining for favours and services from other egos, and this is what the world calls love. Of course, sooner or later, I start to feel resentful because I think that I'm putting a lot more into this relationship, job, class, or course, than I'm getting out of it. And then the ego starts to look around for someone else, or some other situation, that it can strike a better deal with.

That is, where can I give less, and get more of the goodies I am believing that I need? In this way, the ego uses all relationships and situations to try to get its illusory needs met, and when it fails to see these needs met, moves on the the next person, or the next situation, or the next any other thing that it believes will fill the lack it experiences.

Loving from the truth of me means that I don't need to make bargains to try to make a facsimile of the experience of truly loving, or withdraw my love when things aren't going my way. When I love truly, everything that I give to another, I am receiving simultaneously. Only what I am not giving in any situation can be missing, so when I am feeling a scarcity of love, or in a state of fear, I look into my own mind and heart to see where I am witholding the love that I am. When I reconnect with the truth of who I am, I am also reconnected with an abundance of love, and there is nothing missing at all!

Illusions

2009-01-19T22:08:00.001-06:00

Salvation lies in the simple fact that illusions are not fearful because they are not true.

When I wake up in the morning, my frightening dreams of the night before are easy to recognize as "only dreams" When I wake up to the truth, the illusions of this world will also be easy to recognize as "only illusions".
Love, Elaine

The great deception

2009-01-19T14:27:00.006-06:00

"This is the great deception of the world, and you are the great deceiver of yourself. It always seems to be another who is evil, and in his sin you are the injured one. How could freedom be possible if this were so? You would be a slave to everyone, for what he does entails your fate, your feelings, your despair or hope, your misery or joy."

I read this passage yesterday, and was reminded anew how much joy I have in my life when I am not believing that I am at the affect of other people. It is easy for me to be upset at someone´s tone of voice, or an action I think is unjustified, and when I remind myself that none of this says anything about me, and work with whatever belief is triggered by their action, I am back at peace, and in charge of how I feel, and how I experience all of my realationships.

I have found that there is no half way about this. Either I am responsible for everything that I think and feel, or none of it. If I am not responsible for any of it, I continue to be a victim of the world, and of all the people and circumstances around me. When I take ownership of my feelings, thoughts and experiences, I am free, and I have an endless supply of love to enjoy, because I never need to pull back in fear.

Your friend, working on a deception free day!

Love,

Dawn

Lost and Found

2009-01-16T21:05:00.001-06:00

A couple of days ago I was hiking with a small group of people who are staying with us, and two dogs. We climbed up and down over beautiful green pastures edged with trees, through barbed-wire fences and past gentle looking cows. We finally came to a small creek nestled into the gully of a hill which I had seen previously and wanted to explore.

We made our way down to the creek, and crossed over to the other side on the rocks protruding above the surface of the water. Once on the other side, I saw a hill that was new to me, and led my little group to the top of it. We enjoyed a breath-taking view of Lake Arenal and the surrounding jungle areas and pastures.

I would like to add at this point that among my friends I have the reputation of being able to get lost between the dining room and the kitchen, meaning that I have a misplaced sense of direction, or a strong sense of mis-direction. Despite some evidence that this is true, I am never discouraged, and always believe that I know exactly where I am going.

To continue the story of our hike, we admired the view for awhile, and then I lead off in a direction I thought would meet up with our regular hiking trail. We walked for quite a while, but still, I saw nothing that looked familiar. I eventually realized I was lost (again!). We continued on, crawling under tightly strung barbed-wire fences, dodging cows and cow pies and at one point deluged with a tropical rain storm. We also traversed some very steep cow paths, clinging to the side of the hills we were skirting.

Finally I recognized some trees along a fence line that we had passed earlier, and realized that we had come full circle to where we had started our adventure, close to the creek in the gully.

As we headed home, I realized how much fun and laughter we had had during the afternoon. There was a shared sense of adventure, and an appreciation of the beauty that was surrounding us on all sides.

I recalled that for many years in my life, I would have mercilessly criticized myself for getting lost, and would have been surrounded by people who would have been angry and upset, looking for someone to blame.

I appreciate how much fun life is when I am a love finder, not a fault finder, and how easy it is when I am surrounded by like-minded people. Living from an open-hearted appreciation that whatever comes my way can only be for good, my life has become richer than I ever thought it could be. When I look only for where I can give love in each situation I find myself in my resting state is peace.

Sending you much love,

Your friend with a compass with three N points on it, and a furrowed brow

Dawn

Loving thought

2009-01-15T13:12:00.000-06:00

Every loving thought is true. Everything else is an appeal for healing and help, regardless of the form it takes.

When I remember this, I respond to all the forms that look like hatred and rejection, with compassion. Love, Elaine

A fast car on a slow road

2009-01-12T17:28:00.006-06:00

Perception is consistent. What you see reflects your thinking. And your thinking but reflects your choice of what you want to see.

I read the above passage this morning, shortly after I woke up, and thought about what I would like to see in my day today.

I decided that I wanted to see a day filled with peace, and with acceptance of all that comes my way. I used this as my guideline: whenever I was not at peace, I would ask myself what I was choosing to see that was causing my lack of peace.

A little later in the day, I had a long drive to make, and was breezing down the road, driving fast. I nearing my destination, and still covering the kilometers quickly when all of a sudden I came up behind a string of five cars, all crawling along behind a very slow, heavily loaded truck. There was no opportunity for passing on this narrow, two lane winding road.

For a moment, I lost that joyful, free feeling, and felt annoyance and frustration, seeing the impossibility of doing anything but completing the remainder of my drive very slowly. I looked at the situation for a moment, and realized that my perception was that something had gone wrong, something had happened that shouldn’t have. This way of looking at it cost me my peace of mind. I realized that for a moment, I was back living in a world where things go wrong, and frustrate me continually, a world of struggle and hard work.

I wanted to change what I was seeing, so I reminded myself that this moment is perfect, just as it is, and does not need be any other way in order for me to enjoy it. I corrected my belief that life is a struggle, and the thought that anything that goes well and easily is always quickly followed by difficulties.

A hard luck story that I was only too happy to give up!

I moved back into peace, and enjoyed the rest of my drive through the beautiful sunlit countryside of Costa Rica, with a peaceful heart and a quiet mind.

Your friend with a fast car on a slow road, loving it all.

Love,

Dawn

Guilt

2009-01-10T10:06:00.000-06:00

Guilt feelings are the preservers of time. They induce fears of retaliation or abandonment, and thus ensure that the future will be like the past.

My ego goes over and over the stories of my accepted or projected guilt, and finds more and more evidence that my "story" is the only one. Then I behave in the way that I believe is" just the way I am." Thank God its not true. Love, Elaine

Feeling free!

2009-01-09T12:22:00.003-06:00

In reality you are perfectly unaffected by all expressions of lack of love. These can be from yourself and others, from yourself to others, or from others to you. Peace is an attribute in you. You cannot find it outside.

I read this passage today, and was thinking about a friend of mine who recently dealt with something I asked him to do in a way that my ego considered a betrayal of our friendship, and a breech of trust. I was experiencing a sense of loss and sadness, and wanted another way to look at the whole situation.

As I reflected on how I was feeling, I realized that the feelings were generated because I have beliefs that I can be hurt and I can be betrayed, and those beliefs were triggered by my friend's actions. I reminded myself that the truth of who I am cannot be affected by anything outside of me, and that I have a bottomless well of love inside of me, to draw on and to share.

What first appeared to be an action based on a lack of love by another was actually an opportunity for me to look past the mistaken beliefs I held about myself, and to affirm the truth of who I am. In doing this, I also affirmed the truth of who he is, which can only be love, and was able to respond to his cry for love by extending love to him.

I'm happy to be reminded that my peace and my joyous sense of aliveness do not depend on what others do or don't do around me!

Wishing you a day filled with freedom.

Love,

Dawn

Impossible?

2009-01-08T12:06:00.000-06:00

You are in an impossible situation only because you think it is possible to be in one.

To think that my situation is impossible means that I have judged it. I believe that I know what the form of a situation should look like and when it doesn't, I lament and think something has gone wrong. What if nothing has gone wrong? How about asking that wonderful question; "What is it for?" instead of " Oh my Gawd, this is terrible!" As I mentioned previously, this question opens my mind to possibilities instead of closing it off in fear. Love Christie

Fear

2009-01-08T08:47:00.001-06:00

The presence of fear is a sure sign that you are trusting in your own strength.

When I am in fear I am assuming that I need to exert control in order to arrive at a certain outcome. I will gain much more peace if I surrender this idea and realize that I haven't a clue what outcome might be everyone's best interest. My ego thinks I know, but in truth, I do not. In fear there is anxiety and upset but in surrender there is peace. Love Christie

What's missing?

2009-01-06T15:30:00.008-06:00

Only what I have not given can be missing in any situation

I was thinking about the above quote as I moved through my day today. I was looking at a couple of situations in my life where I sometimes experience a sense of lack, and a feeling of being deprived. Since these feelings do not consistently occur each time the situation arises, what is it that makes the difference in my experience?

When I approach anyone or any situation with fear, and with a sense of holding myself back, to see how things go, I do not feel safe or generous, and I come from a sense of scarcity in my interactions. It is the act of holding back the love, until I see whether it is safe, that gives me the experience that something is missing in my day, whether I am shopping, talking with friends, or writing or reading. I am missing the experience of love, and of being loved, because in withholding it in any situation, I am withholding it from myself.

My ego always has good reasons for me to do this, and cautions me many times a day to be sensible, be careful, and to withhold the love and the joy I am until I see whether the other, or the situation, deserves it.

The thing I like about all of this, is that life is like an ongoing experiment in a petri dish (for some!) and as I observe my thoughts and my experiences, I can keep correcting habitual fear thoughts so that I bring myself back to the truth of who I am, and back to the experience of love and fullness in all of my interactions.

Here's to much love in a petri dish!

Dawn

Being tired

2009-01-06T12:16:00.000-06:00

You are not really capable of being tired, but you are very capable of wearying yourself. The strain of constant judgment is virtually intolerable.

When I am feeling tired I ask myself; "What are your judgments that are coming up?" Usually there are plenty! And then I ask, with each judgment; "Is this true?" Sometimes I want to be right but I do notice how the judgments are fatiguing. When I am in my right mind, I can recognize that these judgments are not true and that I don't know what the outcome of any given situation should look like. It is not all up to me and my worth is not established by what I do. My worth is pre-established and is intrinsic. Love Christie

Remembering who you are

2009-01-03T23:41:00.001-06:00

I was reflecting today on how it can seem very difficult to remember the truth of who I am, but how quickly it becomes second nature as I work with healing mistaken beliefs I have about myself. Most of us live from a false identity (the ego) composed of all kinds of mistaken beliefs about who we are. When clients come down to work with us, it is usually because living out their beliefs has created so much pain that they are unable to continue going on as they are. A few beliefs that almost everyone seems to harbor and create evidence for in their lives are: I am unlovable, I am guilty, I am worthless and I don't belong. These beliefs are created at a very young age from a mistaken interpretation of the events around us. As long as beliefs are hidden from conscious awareness, I have no choice but to live out the programming that I have created for myself, and am unable to create meaningful change in my life. In fact, living from this position, I experience myself as being a victim of the world, and seem to be at the mercy of people, events and circumstances around me.

As people begin to become aware of their beliefs, and actively work to correct them, they become more and more aware of their innocence, of the peace and joy that is their natural state, and of the deepest truth that we all share: I am only love, and anything else that I experience comes from a belief I made up, which is simply an error that can be corrected.

Through consistent identification and correction of beliefs, I have seen time and time again people re-create their lives from the inside out. They move out of a life based on anger, fear, depression and despair and move into a life of harmony, peace and deep love and acceptance for self and others. With this work comes a deep confidence in the natural ability we all share to be at peace in any situation, and also the knowledge that any time I allow my old beliefs pull me off track I can quickly use the tools I have to return to my naturally harmonious state.

Wishing you a joy filled day of remembering who you are.

Love,

Dawn

Thought

2009-01-02T23:27:00.001-06:00

You do not know the meaning of anything you perceive. Not one thought you hold is wholly true. The recognition of this is your firm beginning.

I can hear some objections, well, hold it! I have loving thoughts and aren't they true? All of our thoughts come from a belief that we are separate from God, or the Universe or Love whatever you may want to call it. We work with the idea that this is not true. In truth, we are always connected. Every thought comes from a belief in separation and the truth is abstract, formless Love. Love, Christie

I'd Rather be at Peace

2009-01-01T20:41:00.011-06:00

I woke up this morning feeling out of sorts and a bit anxious about what the day would bring. When I am feeling less than joyful, my practice is to look at my thoughts to see what I am thinking and believing about myself that is causing the apparent loss of peace.

I saw that I was holding someone guilty in my mind, and sending thoughts of anger and blame his way. I opened one of my favorite books, and read a passage that has inspired me often in the past, which reminded me to dwell on the many kindnesses and loving deeds my brother has shared with me. When I do this, I am able to see the truth of who he is (and who I am too) instead of looking at the mistakes he has made, and all of the hurts my ego accuses him of causing me.

I closed my eyes to picture him clearly, reviewing some of his many loving words and actions towards me. I began to feel lighter, and as I continued on, started to feel energized and optimistic again. By the end of the ten minutes I spent on this, I was back to being at peace, and feeling that all was well with the world.

For me, this is the simplicity and beauty of the work we do: I always get to choose what I focus on, and whatever that focus is, creates my experience. With every thought, I am choosing between the experience of love and joining or one of sadness, fear and depression. If I am not enjoying what I am experiencing, I am always free to choose again!

Love,

Dawn

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T10:04:00.002-06:00

Love

2009-01-01T09:56:00.001-06:00

Love rests on certainty. Only uncertainty can be defensive. And all uncertainty is doubt about yourself.

When I am in a loving place I am solid in who I am. If, however, I have temporarily forgotten the truth, then I may become defensive and underneath this defensiveness is uncertainty about myself. I am doubting my abilities in some way. Forgiveness will guide me away from uncertainty back into the wonderful truth that I am part of Oneness.

Love Christie

Merry Christmas

2008-12-25T10:48:00.001-06:00

It is not love that asks a sacrifice. But fear demands the sacrifice of love, for in love’s presence fear cannot abide.

Choose love today!

Merry Christmas,Elaine

Pain

2008-12-23T18:50:00.001-06:00

Tolerance for pain is high, but it is not without limit. Eventually everyone begins to recognize, however dimly, that there must be a better way.

If I can just keep this idea in the back of my mind all the time, then when I am tempted to think that things are not going well I can choose to look for, and recognize a better way. Love , Elaine

Who I am

2008-12-21T16:24:00.005-06:00

“We are all living in the nectar of the Self and yet we all cry: 'I am suffering!' Everybody is in Devine Grace. Grace is around everybody.Yet we are not satisfied.”

Sri H.W. Poonja

The more I explore the idea of 'who I am', the more I realize the depth of my addiction to suffering. I find that I am addicted to the 'small s' self I made up. The fact that I seemingly share that addiction with about six billion others makes it no more palatable. Today I will look upon everything as if I have never seen it before; today I will experience and taste the ‘nectar of the Self’. Love to One and all, Diederik

Punishment

2008-12-19T10:57:00.002-06:00

“Any concept of punishment involves the projection of blame, and reinforces the idea that blame is justified.
The result is a lesson in blame, for all behavior teaches the beliefs that motivate it.”

"Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us."

Rainer Maria Rilke

I just read that the U.S. is building 200 new beds per day for correctional institutions ………. wow.
Isn’t it time I wake up and recognize that every word, every act can only have one of two intentions: a cry for love or an extension of love? Isn’t it time I start responding with love to a cry for love? Isn’t it time I start hearing my OWN cry for love and extending love to it? Isn’t it time I start recognizing the enemy within and start loving him? Wouldn't it make a great Christmas present, recognizing that I made it up, recognizing I am not that evil thing I thought I was all this time? And, if I am not that evil thing then who is there to blame? There is no blame, there is only Love.

I am reminded of those beautiful words by Ste. Catherine of Siena: "The Absolute Innocence of all within my creation will take a little while to understand." Love to One and all,

Diederik

Reality

2008-12-18T10:47:00.002-06:00

“Whatever I accept in my mind has reality for me.
It is my acceptance of it that makes it real.”

Where to start on this one.
To those of us who have committed their lives to a purpose of peace and joy, it is self-explanatory.
To those of us who still harbor some secret wish that something from outside our minds will make us happy, this is anathema.
It comes down to a choice between being a victim of outside circumstances or the author of my entire experience ... no matter what the world seems to throw at me! Seems like an easy choice, doesn’t it? Please do not underestimate the seductive and addictive power of the victim mindset. Love to One and all, Diederik

About clinging

2008-12-16T22:18:00.001-06:00

“Clinging to non-eternal things is arrogance. No clinging is Loving all, so don’t cling and don’t don’t cling because both conceal the Truth.”

Sri H.W.L. Poonja

Arrogance could then be seen as just the idea of ‘I’ since the ‘I’ can only be sustained by ‘clinging’ or attachment. Without attachment all is One. Attachment is the thought that sustains duality or ‘other’.

Non-attachment is the constant focus of our path and it is a path with many bumps, road blocks, detours and such. Here is a little exercise we often suggest at our center: make a list of everything in your life , both positive and negative. Everything that now seems important, things like sex, children, health, chocolate… Everything. Then ask your self: “If it is True that I am Love and nothing else, none of these would hold the slightest sway over my moods. Since my moods inevitably swing from happy to growling there must be things on this list I am not willing to let go of.” Identify the non-negotiables, maybe it is sex, maybe it is chocolate (to many that is the same thing…) then ask your self: “What belief about myself is sustained by this need?” In other words, what does this bring me that I believe I don’t have? In Truth, of course, there is nothing I don’t have, I am whole and I am complete so this must be an echo of a mistaken belief. Have fun with this, if you are really honest you will learn a lot about why you have the things in your life that you do, both positive and negative. Love to One and all, Diederik

Rumi Quote

2008-12-16T07:47:00.002-06:00

Beyond our ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing, there is a field. I'll meet you there. When the soul lies down in that grass, the world is too full to talk about. Ideas, language, even the phrase 'each other' doesn't make any sense anymore.

Jelaluddin Rumi.

The Victim

2008-12-15T21:32:00.003-06:00

At Choose Again we teach that nothing from outside of our minds can have any real effect on how we feel. Nothing outside my mind can hurt me or bring me joy and peace. This is a stretch for everyone, from total beginner to seasoned spiritual traveler. The Victim in me starts to scream, objecting loudly. The Victimizer in me has that evil little grin on his face .... the Victimizer in me sees this as a free pass. The Victimizer in me, however, doesn't grasp that I am always attacking myself. I am the Victim of my Victimizer, we are one and the same.

If I am willing to consider that I choose my experience then why would I not choose a happy one? Then I send forgiveness to both the Victim and the Victimizer, love them equally and smile. Love to One and all, Diederik

Holotropic breathing

2008-12-13T11:59:00.000-06:00

Once a week we do a group breathing exercise at the Choose Again Center in Costa Rica called Holotropic breathing. Over the years participants have reported a variety of results from the absolute sublime to a neutral: “What was that all about……..?“. A couple of days ago I had the pleasure of facilitating a private breathing with a young man of 16 years old. This young man is having all kinds of troubles at school, at home and in all aspects of his relationships. He is angry, feels hopeless and believes nothing will ever work out for him. I chose to do a private breathing as he slept through his first group breathing experience without any noticeable results. After breathing for ten minutes he sat up and said: “Why am I doing this?“ I explained that it was impossible to predict what might happen and to just have an open mind. He continued for another 30 minutes and stated he had enough. I selected a different CD, Deva Premal, and played the first cut, asking him to breathe again. After that cut he sat up and said: “That was incredible, I could see all kinds of things, but I don’t know what they mean, could we play that same number again?“ When the first cut had finished he sat up and said: “Anything is possible!. I have the potential to be and do anything!“ This from a boy who had until that moment felt hopeless, angry and disassociated with everyone and everything around him. Anything is possible when I remove all the barriers to Love I have erected! Love to One and all.